Updated: Apr 14
So often people say “they want to lose weight”, and it sounds so shallow and vain, to only care about what we look like, but it’s how we feel too, and what is weight?
We just got back from Great Wolf Lodge. A place I would normally never go. Because it is very expensive, and a lot of money is spent on things that are cheap, that we do not need, that take from and pollute the earth, that are unhealthy for us, and it’s honestly an insult to nature (more fake than real).
But, the reasons we went are: my kids were refused access to public school (until Sept 2022), we can’t travel because we know how to recover from illness and we value our health, and we have family who are keeping their distance because they believe the mainstream news (to be afraid always, especially of those who refuse to con-form). So, here we are. And, it gives me a chance to look around, and see how I feel.
Well, I am happy to report that I don’t judge the way I used to. I no longer look and compare to myself, with an inner shallow narrative, about who is better and who should be shamed.
That is the weight I have dropped from my childhood.
Instead, I see the health, the lack of health, the kindness, the pent up anger, I feel the lethargy, a racing heart, and I see the rash on my kids’ skin, and the solutions that I have, to course correct.
So many areas of concern that many people do not even know about. And that I have not even tried to tackle, because I was afraid to fail and lose faith. Now I know I need to try. Despite the time and energy it takes. Life will offer me the exact resources I need, if and when I am intended to use them. And if not, I let go to the next opportunity.
My husband and son carry excess weight (I do too, of course). My husband is mostly interested in healing modalities to help him lose weight, and I wish he would focus on other aspects of health, but in truth, he is!
Excess weight kills. Not just because we shame people for being fat (we do this as a joke, it’s mean, but it also helps to keep the reminder top of mind, so we don’t forget to do something about it).
Excess weight is rotting garbage, that we should have released long ago. And, this is why, when we release it, others should not be around to absorb it, because it is thick toxic smelly garbage, that we have been working hard, to keep away from our heart.
From an Esogetic Medicine perspective, a sign that this was coming: our youngest bruised her right big toe. This toe corresponds to Sagittarius landing in the body (fire, Jupiter, expansion), where we poison ourselves with poor diet, so we have an excuse not to walk our life path.
And, if we allow this pattern to continue, it breaks down our joints and stomach, our ability to process and move, (earth, Saturn, responsibility), our nervous system, our ability to communicate smoothly with our selves, (air, Uranus, individuality), our emotions, (water, Neptune, spiritual gifts), and we transcend (water again, Pluto, change or die).
People think using the word “transcend” is fancy, meaning that they are above and not concerned about death. But it’s still death, and often times avoidable, for a time, if we are willing to care enough to do something hard. Most aren’t, because it is easier to be a victim (that’s how we think we get back at those who hurt us, but). We extend our playing time by making an effort to try, and it’s worth it. Not out of fear, but out of love for the game, to see all the possibilities. It’s what we’re here for.
So, I will work on my husband, and son (who says to me “you’re not wanting to go back to the room because of me, are you?”).
My son is so sensitive to his impact on others, and yet, he also tries to be authentic to himself (some things simply scare him, because of the baggage he continues to carry, some from his experience in the birthing canal, much like a water slide, eh?). The life he enjoyed and used to have, where he felt safe, gets taken from him, again and again and again.
And I treat him as an equal, by offering him my unpolished truth, as well as coming back to tell when he was right and I was wrong, to support him to be whole again.
So many people, walking around, carrying marks of burdens, which will later become surprise serious diagnoses, which came out of nowhere, but not really.
My body doubled its poo output at great wolf lodge, and my son’s recovered sty spat out puss. I gave my girls RestoreChi water baths and cream to clear the rash on their legs. All of these represent lungs and grief in TCM (and water, theta, dream state, truth, conflict resolution, and unconditional love in Esogetic Medicine). We’re getting somewhere!
The girls have healthier bodies than the rest of us, because they literally die to each moment and live in chaos. Yes, this is hard to parent, but they crunch everything little bit of life and let it go, as they should, especially our youngest. Celebrating the successful throw, unconcerned with the outcome:
And I will support our son, to find ways to compassionately do the same. He carries more baggage than his sisters, because he detoxed me (as my first born). But, I will help detox him, while respecting his limits (he doesn’t bath any more, he showers, but he will sit through Esogetic Sound Healing with me, and much more).
Bit by bit, we let go, we heal, we die to each moment, we gain, and maintain, our health.
And, for the skinny folk, well, there are two types of skinny. The kind who refuse to process and store anything, and that‘s ok, but that is not health. Every time I lost weight, it was from self hatred. Instead, let it in, crunch it, process it, grow, fall, fail, and get back up.
My body is not perfect. I have things that I still can’t heal. I had kids late, there are parts of me that may never bounce back, and that’s ok. I don’t look at myself too much. I try to dress, eat, and drink non-toxic, and continue to love what is there, asking to be worked on. And sometimes things let go.
My grief vents through my anger and worry, but it would be easier, to let it release through grief.
I hope this helps.
The skinny Lego friends and Next Generation My Little Ponies may not be telling us to be anorexic after all, but to process with love, so we can enjoy life with less pain.
And we see this in them, because we are one, reflecting truth, for our selves, to see.
Sending love, and gratitude, to a great trip, and return home.
Perspectives seen, honoured, digested, and to be put into action, for the greatest good, of the whole.
We teach the things we invested the time to really learn. And, when experiences are honoured and used well, they are no longer a waste. This is how the earth partners with us in gratitude. It can transform, if we do our part too. We’re not just the takers, or at least, we don’t have to be.