Rite of passage - mixing chemistry
I’ve been watching the reactions to the V. At times heart broken at the damage it has and may continue to cause. It occurred to me that the benefit of heart muscle and surrounding tissue inflammation is: people will learn where their heart is, and how to care for it. And those who look on with a range of emotions: from anger, to frustration, to compassion, will learn to work with how they feel, and why.
I react very strongly to most things. I take on the multidimensional symptoms of many of my clients, in order to learn how to resolve their symptoms. And my reactions to people who V have taught me about my: liver, spleen, teeth, gums, heart, pancreas, intestines, nerves, detox systems, sinuses, throat, and much much more!
Recently I’ve had some issues with some places, and have not been able to pin point why. It’s easy to say: high V content, or fhive gee hot spot, but, I’ve had two hints that it’s more than that.
Chlorine in the water, bleach on the toys/surface. Everyone is so scared, they are willing to mix chemicals, and expose them to others, because they don’t understand how nature compensates, teaches, and balances. I’m not saying I understand fully either, I’m still working on it. But, I also watch, and listen, in a multidimensional way.
This week, my bras broke, no more support, shortly after, the preschool I was integrating my child into, pretty much said she should be in a parented program, because having her there, with me, with her older sister to support, means she is not playing with others. What it really means is: she is protected, and they prefer to remove that protection. 0-3yrs you get protection in a parented program, 2.5-5yrs protection is ripped away. Their go to is: you leave the child there, screaming, and you run away, so when the staff try to look for you, they can show the child, you’re gone, they really were abandoned, and this breaks them enough, to get them to accept, what being a good girl means… and then they serve as an example for the next child, of what a good girl does, they are silent, patiently waiting, while their toys are torn away, and the adult scolds the next child that “sharing is caring”, while you die a bit inside, because that was you too, and don’t you want to be like them?
My almost 3yr old hit this staff in the stomach, maybe she deserved it, wake up, this is no different from sleep training. You do it if you have to, but that doesn’t make it right, it means you are willing to break the soul and spirit of a child to gain con-troll over your life (but you can never really control your life, or anything, and that’s why it’s a con, a lie). And, I don’t mean to be mean, it’s just what it is.
Bleach, is the same. Our next stop was a drop in parented program. Starts with: masks are not required, but recommended, because the masked staff has (Ved?) kids at home with covid. So, here we have covid and the V brewing under a mask, creating super bacteria, and then the liberal spray of bleach, which was announced when my child touched a toy during story time, after play time was “closed” (my we spray that bleach fast!), and by the time I got home, two blocks away, I had a raw sore throat, into my chest, and shortly after diarrhea.
At first I thought it was the scar tissue in my body, from covid I contracted, when a Ved masked person kissed my child right after removing the mask she wore for hours on multiple flights, without washing her face or detoxing first, acting up again, at the sign of danger. Some say you can get covid twice, but, maybe the body just warns, in a way to protect. All scar tissue does this. Which is why someone with a foot or joint injury will say “they can feel the storm coming in their bones” (aka the site of injury reacts to small changes in weather pressure).
How about that weather? Still winter, when it’s almost May? I wonder why? I think it’s hilarious that the politicians focus on “environmentally friendly stuff” when the biggest assault to the environment was the V and the masks and the chemicals sprayed. The earth knows how to self clean, one of its ways is to wipe us off her planet! It’s ridiculous this fear, instead of actually learning to cope with illness, and set good boundaries. But also understandable, it’s where people were at, remember the good girl, who doesn’t fight back for her toy, or even negotiate or teach kindly, just let the staff, the government, the authorities handle it, and tell me what to do, as I sit quietly and wait, helpless, my parent abandoned me, I’m a good little girl.
And, the glass I am mixing my kid’s egg in shatters, literally, the glass ceiling is pierced. We see there is more to this than what the snow globe (the postage stamp, the box we were told to live in) provides…
If my child has covid, I am home with my child, carrying for him/her. I am not at work, in a mask, spraying bleach, to hurt others, because I’m scared. Again, I am not trying to be mean, or judge, or out people. I am trying to teach, what my body and environment (multidimensional experiences) are teaching me.
The throat constricts and raws to raises sensitivity and try to keep out, much like my kids develop rashes on their skin to try to keep chlorinated pool water out. Too much chlorine. Not just in the pools, but in the drinking water, and cleaning products. My kids vomited profusely after a trip to great wolf lodge and a sip of water from the fountain at aerosport trampoline (where vomit was also spotted in the play structure), the staff ran in a panic saying under their breath “it’s leaking everywhere”.
That‘s exactly it! It’s leaking everywhere. And, if you read about chlorine/bleach, you’ll find it reacts with other chemicals, including vinegar (what more health conscious people may use for cleaning). Yes, it smells bad, that’s the point, we use our sense of smell to know what is present and what our limit is. And, the true adept uses nothing, no cleaning products, barely soap, only to clean what is visible or tactile/sticky, they just listen multidimensionally, and, adjust their boundaries, according to their limits and skills to recover and protect. We can all take a day off work, many days, and a day off a program.
It takes a strong willingness to be honest with oneself, and a desire to do the hard thing, and break the cycle of laziness and self inflicted pain.
After exposure to the ymca I was getting a racing heart and mistimed, prolonged, bright red, vaginal bleeding, and I was sleeping a lot more to recover from being there. My daughter is now sleeping more to recover from the incidents this week. It’s not wrong. When we sleep, we process conflict, let go, and find our truth.
I have tools, procedures, resilience, contacts. I’m fine. She’s fine. The world is fine, we are learning.
Illness is a rite of passage. I am not interested in cellular rejuvenation, rites of the sculpture, because I am lazy, it’s too much work, requires too much support from others, who care and know more, and there is a serious drought of any of that now. And, while I am 44yrs in and the first bunch of years are hard, and now I am coasting, I still don’t feel the need to extend my life. I’ll do what I can to help and support and guide in the time I am given, and it will be perfect, because I am not holding onto anything, I know it’s all perfect. And so, each day, I face, with unknowing and full knowing. I hear the suggestions, the lessons, I see the person is kind, they know not what they do, and it is not me to be their teacher, unless they seek me to be taught.
My child will not be peeled of her support, as one would expose a corn from its husk, to be eaten. When she is ready, she will separate from me, and enter the world, and return as much as needed, and re-enter again.
Sending love to all, in the roles you play, in the collection, dispersion, or processing of karma. I process, because I need no more pain or human sh*t (diarrhea is literally unprocessed experiences/food, what we simply need to release, because it’s more than we can or should have to handle, let’s leave the bulls alone, though they suffer too from the Vs, chemicals, and masks). I process, on behalf of my clients, family, and the collective, to know what works to get us out. It’s quite simple, and to be determined, and we are resilient enough, for both ends of the spectrum. Polarity, oneness, completion, namaste, the light in me recognizes the light in you, we are one. So let’s be kind, do our part, and let others choose whether they are going to do theirs, and what that means for them to do.